The Cost of a Ticket

I can’t believe how much it costs to see bad movies. I mean like really bad movies. I don’t mind going to the theatre and paying $10.00 to see a good movie. Heck I’d even pay a little more than that to see a real good movie like Kingsman: The Secret Service. But come on they want me to pay $10.00 to go see Jupiter Ascending. Based on the trailers alone, I’m not even willing to pay the $6.00 early bird price.

Here’s the deal, if I go to McDonalds I pay $1.29 for a cruddy little hamburger, and if I want a better quality burger I’ll go to Culver’s and get a Butterburger for $2.79. At Red Robin I’m willing to pay over $8.00 for a real good burger, as long as I don’t have to hear that Red Robin commercial jingle. And if I’m ever in Vegas I’ve got no issue paying $13.00 for a Gordon Ramsay hamburger at BurGR! It would be worth even more if I got to hear Gordon bloody well yell at the chef while eating it. So basically prices are based on quality. The better quality the burger, the more we are willing to pay.

Why can’t we figure out some way to charge the same thing for movies? I mean come on they know before the movie hits the theatre if it’s any good. They really do. That’s why sometimes they won’t even release a film for early reviews. For example anyone that tells you that the producers thought they had a high quality product in the can when they shipped out the prints for Fifty Shades of Grey they are lying. I mean seriously even the star’s mom won’t go and see it. And don’t believe her when she says it’s because of the sexual content……Melanie Griffith married Don Johnson TWICE, she’s not some paragon of virtue.

Heck, in all reality they know when they get the script if they have the makings of a good movie, and then when they cast it, they know for sure. For all we know they use the casting as their real way of telling the quality of a film. Let’s say it’s a film with a nice juicy role for an actress in her 40’s or 50s. They offer the film first to Meryl or Julianne, if they turn it down they know it’s not the best script ever. Then they go to Cate Blanchett or Nicole Kidman, if they turn it down then they know the script isn’t perfect. Now they are working their way down the list, maybe they try Julia Roberts or Annette Benning, and if they turn it down then they know they can’t release the movie during Oscar Season. At this point they are starting to check out the top of the line TV talent, let’s say Robin Wright or Allison Janney, and if they can’t get them, well let’s face it, it’s a movie featuring a woman in her 40’s……they’re scrapping the entire project. But you get the idea, right?

So maybe they could fix their prices based on the quality of stars in the film, just like restaurants do with their burgers. After all a McDonald’s hamburger may be 100% beef, but it’s not low fat content beef like a Gordon Ramsay burger is. Here’s my thoughts on how we might start pricing movie tickets, using current movies in theatres today:

Movie with a Wannabe Actor/Actress – $2.00

Examples: Jupiter Ascending (Mila Kunis), The Lazarus Effect (Olivia Wilde)

Movie with a Rising Star  – $4.00

Example: The DUFF (Mae Whitman) ’71 (Jack O’Connell)

Movie with an Established Star – $8.00

Example: Focus (Will Smith), American Sniper (Bradley Cooper)

Movie with Julianne Moore, Colin Firth or Meryl Streep – $12.00

Movie with Julianne Moore, Colin Firth AND Meryl Streep – The Skies the Limit

  

So what do you think? Wouldn’t you rather buy your movie tickets like that?

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This post was in response to the Finish the Sentence Friday prompt, “I can’t believe how much it costs to,” hosted by Kristi of Finding Ninee and co-hosted this week by Kerri of The Latchkey Mom, Kelly of Diagnosed and Still Ok, and Anna of Fit Funner.