Well, tomorrow is the big day. The third most important day of the year. The first of course being my birthday (249 shopping days left people). The second being Academy Award Sunday. And then there is tomorrow! What, you ask, is tomorrow? I’m going to pretend that you didn’t ask, because you have to know. I mean, come on, how could you not know? Seriously, if you don’t know I’m not exactly sure what part of the rainforest you have been in, but welcome back to society and the world where Frank Underwood is the scariest politician ever. Yes, even scarier than George W.
Tomorrow Netflix releases the third season of House of Cards. Yes, that is right, the best web series in the short-lived history of web series, and one of the best series ever, period, is finally returning for us all to savor…. or binge, whichever is your preference. Now if you are not one of those people who has discovered this show, I encourage you to find one of your friends that is watching it and tell them that you are not watching the show. I don’t as a general rule of thumb endorse violence, but you do indeed deserve the slap across the back of the head that you will get. Well at least you would if I were that friend, because believe me it is much more important that you watch this show than it is that you drink any glass of V8.
House of Cards stars Kevin Spacey as Frank Underwood, a man who almost makes Dick Cheney seem angelic, and Robin Wright as his wife, a woman who makes Hillary Clinton seem like she is lacking in ambition. Add to that a supporting cast that includes a who’s who of character actors that you have seen in everything else but never noticed until now when their character does something totally shocking, smarmy and at the very least borderline illegal. Michael Kelly as Frank’s Chief of Staff, Doug Stamper, is especially good at bringing the smarm (is that a word?) to a whole new level. Even the characters that you think actually have some form of a moral compass are bound to shock you with something like, I don’t know, let’s say a secret service threesome. Yeah, that’s right a threesome with two corrupt politicians and their “bodyman”. Now if that doesn’t give the term “bodyman” a whole new meaning I don’t know what could.
If I told you some of the stuff the politicians on this show do you wouldn’t believe me, because it all just seems ridiculous and impossible. Let me stop right here and assure you that the writers of this show are not Shonda Rhymes bat shit crazy. We’re not going to see live Presidential Mistress Auctions. But we are going to see drugs, alcoholism, backstabbing, dirty dealings, sexual liaisons that know no boundaries, and oh maybe a few murders. And just when you think they have reached a new level of low they go even lower. Yeah I know how ridiculous that sounds. It’s Washington DC, they’re politicians in the public eye. How could they get away with all of that? But that’s the secret of the show’s success. Nothing they do is that unbelievable. We want to believe that it could never happen, not in our nation’s capital. We want to believe that none of that WILL ever happen, not in the hallowed halls of our government. But then we realize that it might, it could, oh crap, some of it probably has. It will make even a God fearing Republican long for the days of a Josiah Bartlett presidency.
The show is produced by Dana Brunetti, Andrew Davies, Michael Dobbs, and David Fincher. Yes that David Fincher. The director behind Seven, Fight Club, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and Gone Girl. So you know we are dealing with one hell of a twisted mind. And boy does this show deliver some twists and turns that just leaves you speechless. Fincher himself has directed a few episodes, as has Allen Coulter, Joel Schumacher and Jodie Foster. The quality is as good as any movie. I think that may be the reason why it is so hard not to binge watch, you just want to keep going because it is all so fast paced, enthralling, and beautiful to watch.
The show is based off of a BBC miniseries from 1990, oddly enough also called House of Cards, which itself was based on a book written by Michael Dobbs, that true to form has the same title. I mention this because if you get as caught up in this show as I have, a few weeks after watching all of the episodes for at least the second time you will want to watch and read more House of Cards and neither the book or the original BBC series will disappoint, nor does it quite live up to the beauty of Netflix’s monster hit.
Now I know it is on Netflix and you may not have Netflix, but the great thing is you can join Netflix for one month for $8.99. Once you watch this season you can discontinue your membership until next February when they upload the fourth season. And if you are wondering, THERE WILL BE A FOURTH SEASON, because if there isn’t a fourth season I may be forced to throw someone in front of a subway train, and if you don’t think that would kill you, well……